The Swamp Tale

From a comment to a post: here’s the Modern Political History (or should I say Story) of Portugal - The Swamp Tale by The Ectoplasm:

Ok… I can’t help it… I’ll try to sketch the story so far… My personal take, at least…

Once upon a time, one of the most inept governments one could think of had the original idea of converting one entire country into a swamp… People seemed to be happy with that, everything in the swamp was free and, as long as they didn’t have to work that much, they were just fine… Then, someone pointed the finger at the swamp and said: “There is a monster there! These guys created a monster! It’s the Swamp Monster!”. People began to wake up and realized they were immersed in deep… hummm… mud (up to their necks). After some protests, the swamp creator turned his back, purportedly saying “… I guess I’ll be going now. Take care!”.

People were unhappy. They had been deceived, but they only took five or six years to realize their mistake… The solution was easy. They found a landlord who no one thought to be that much brilliant but who seemed to be hard working. This came up handy, as he was given a shovel and told to get rid of all the mud. However, people thought he would need some help. They suggested he might take an assistant… The assistant would not handle the shovel, of course (he could not risk a stain in his gleaming white suit). Did he have any good idea? Well, he would build ships in order to navigate the swamp! There’s an idea! Moreover, he would always say whatever people wanted to listen. Ahhh, the sacrifices one does in order to rule the swamp…

Suddenly, the unthinkable happened. The not-so-brilliant-but-working-guy got tired of the swamp and decided to buy a new villa abroad… So, he turned his back, purportedly saying “… I guess I’ll be going now. Take care!”. Some people got worried, but he also suggested a replacement… One with no special preparation, with no special ideas, disliked by most, but… he was an old friend. This guy was a master of surprise, always devising new ways to refine the swamp. His incompetence was acclaimed as legendary, he was now famous, he could go to (even more) parties… Ahhh, the social life of the swamp was roaring! Well, until the Swamp President kicked his butt, of course… Unfortunately, the playboy did not follow the example of his predecessors and he did not go. Rather, he stayed around, trying to take hold of the swamp, again…

Now, guess what happened… Remember the first swamp creator? Remember his team of incompetent genetic mutants from the swamp? That’s right… They all came back! The exact same guys! Didn’t even bother to disguise themselves! They promised that everything would now be different, that life would definitely improve! We have some ideas, they said… What did people do? They cheered, celebrated, and embraced them…

So, welcome to the Twilight Zone! This is not the story of a small and poor South American country… It’s the story of a small and poor European country. My country, sadly…

PS (no, it’s not the mutant party): there is a guy named Antonio Borges, who lived out of the swamp for a lot of time… Could he please move forward and start preparing the cleaning process? Thank you…

Could’t have said it better myself.